so today i feel like I'm sort of catching up with myself/ I have absolutely no boundaries when it comes to helping and pleasing others. i definelty need to be more of a bitch. I cant just keep being a stupid door mat i will never get what i want.
Fuck anyone else and what they have to say. they dont pay my bills. my clients do. or my job does and i am a hard worker.
Its like these friends only come to me when they need help. those aren't friends. they are energy drainers. Amanda decoste asked me to read this thing with her for free. she's such a user/ I wish she would offer to pay for some of the time i have spent helping her. Its not a friendship. She is coming to me for services.
Anyways. I just need to make it aware to chg for these things.
I have way to much education and smarts to give it away for free. I turn people away all day who want me advice. and are willing to pay me for it. I definitely want to be a good friend and a nice person. But I have friends. I dont need anymore And i will send love and light but stop taking my FUCKING ENERGY
jesus please help me.
imsick of the potions and toxins in the world and wish to be free completely from them, and focus on love and energy. I dont want to be around people who invoke demons and drink and speak badly of others and impress. i guess I'm just burning out , because i never say no to james. i worry I'm not enough for him. i wish i would stop thinking that way. Im so glad I'm reading the bitch book ongoing to therapy i really need it. and am ;earning a lot. i need to put up walls. i do not need to fix or help anyone. god does that. i need to focus on myself. and go to alanon more. and just be happy and thankful.
I do love to offer people love when they come to see me. and need balance and strength for that. i cant diminish it. by people pleasing.