I walked past evans house today, and it was so weird that everything has changed but stayed exactly the same. I feel like i am constantly tested to fall into the v=buy a new home buy a new car thing. I feel like those jobs just suck you in. and those purchases lock you down. In this moment today i got to go for a random walk with monkey, and be chill. I'm so thankful to have my own business and just be real with life. I dont think i will ever want to settle. I want to grow and challenge myself.
I feel like i thought about jared, evans brother, then gary and I'm worried he will take too many pills. i wouldn't even know if he did.
That upsets me. I dont know how i feel about relationships anymore.
sometimes i just dont know how i feel about anything.
I want to lock myself in a room and draw and paint and learn photoshop and take pictures of dogs. I dont want to be so superficial anymore. I wanna be hippy me and let my hair down.
i wanna study the tesla guy and read more books.
I dont wanna stupid job and settle down and be happy. thats complete bullshit. i wanna connect with my spirit follow advice from god, and help people evolve. as i evolve.
life isn't meant to just settle down, its about being creative, and motivated, and pushing boundaries, and making something.
Thats it. its not meant to push a slave cart. so you can buy a house and have a stupid vehicle.
its about living cheap, so you can afford time off to do what you love.
Maybe i need to rent a cheaper place, but i dont have house taxes, or lawn maintenance, or all the other stupid crap.
a new roof, a new door, re paint. I just rent. its easier.
If only i owned like 10 houses and rented them out.
or saved to buy my property somewhere as an investment.
who knows.
I can do more. just follow me. dont listen or trust anyone