So today I come to realize that there is no such thing as time and space. There is only now and only love and energy and connection
. I am a quiet person, but I like to be listened to. I am not materilastic but I like to buy things. I am not shallow but I like to make people pretty. I love painting drawing writing creating and being passionate about life. I do not open up to many people because I tend to religiously open up to the wrong people. I wasn't very sure of myself, and felt that other people didn't feel like I did. Alone confused sad depressed. But they all feel that way. Insecure about their job, how good they are, A bad relationship. And they lie to themselves. When people are mean to you walk away. run away. if they make your heart feel bad then leave/ I wish I could have told myself that years ago.
My mom passes so much negativity on to me, and bad habits. I forgive her. But I am thankful to be in a different place. I cant be close to my family because they never encouraged me. The thing I didn't know before is that you can make new families. and new friends, with nice people. ones you connect with. Not just these fake wannabes. I have no intentions except to become enlightnend. and help others achieve that. Ive spent so long trying to fit into a mold I was never designed to fit in. If I believe in the Matrix, I belive that its time to wakeup and walk away from doubt. It has been doubt and un healthy lifestyle. No one listening to me when I needed help. BUt there are people everwhere waiting to help you. where they come from they only know and feel love. they are not inscure or angry, or doubtful or ashamed or regretful. They are happy and loving and forgiving. They are encouraging welcoming homely they are truth bliss, they are waiting for us. They love us. We must love those who don't love others because they can trap people in the dark.
eLet these beauyiful people shine and not fear the world out there, don't ever go back. keep going forward