So, i had quite the interesting day.
I ended up sleeping i really did have a nap. except i think it made me more tierd. I got up to see the end of the simpsons, and eat some fruit and salad for dinner. i hate eating big things for dinner so late it just sits in my stomach and i feel gross in the morning. yeah.. i actually had the most boring day ever i didnt even do anything productive oh well.
how to describe myself...
Right now, i feel like i have some kind of writers block, i havent been able to paint for almost a month and writing seems forced. whats wrong?
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tomorrow i have school and work and i will hopefully finish my history assignment.
I need to tighten my dreads, and clean my nail polish off my toes. i should clean my room becuase the floor is starting to grow clutteredness. I havent watched any good movies for a while so i think i should pick some up tomorrow. i feel like i already need to quit my job because im honestly not going to be making that much extra money. if i only work 20hours/week at 7$ an hour thats just over 260 every 2 weeks, and i can almost sometimes work that much at the video store anyways, if i leave school a bit early which i am doing for the telemarketing job anyways... and i like the video store more anyways. i should just apply for more money of my credit card, i proobably wont need to spend more then 500$ till the end of the semester anyways, and when the summer comes i will have plenty of time to work and pay off my bills, which is my van 1100, and my overdraft 200, and my credit card 400 which isnt really that much if i worked full time.. most students will be in debt for years before they can pay it off. and if i trade my van in for something cheaper, i can give the extra money to my parents for repairs anyways. why do i get so uptight about spending. i only have less then 2 mmonths left. i believe i do have the time to work and i shouldnt be one of those students who live off of osap becuase they are just being lazy. but i dont want to have to juggle so much beucase right now im enjoying my home time and time with andy.i should start making lots of jewellery and sell that, which was my plan until i found i didnt have enough money for materials. i need an idea, a get rich quick scheme. maybe i will sell myself to the media and be an extra or something. or sell used clothes from my basement, like all the clothes my family has, i will sell them. yes i will sell my family. haha
so im starting to see things again, just weird random shapes of light, i remember this happening wheni was younger for a period i would always see things. so its not really freaking me out, maybe my eyes are just going weird. but i have also been having really strong thoughts about things or peopple, and then i find something out about them the next day like i was having all these urges to call my aunt or make her something at school and send it to her as a suprise, or look her up again on icq to say hi, and i usually dont think of her becuase i havent talked to her in like 10 years in person. and i found out she had tried to commit suicide or something, like she called my grama to say good bye. but i think shes still ok, the weird thing is now im scared to contact her. is that bad? i also have weird thoughts about people at school like jackie, and lisa. im starting to feel that everything happens for weird reasons and if you thought of everything that is occuring around you that you dont know about you would be weirded out. like say i went to mikes mart and picked up a bottle of pop that fell on the ground, and bumped into a person, and the next day i see the person on the bus, and the next day i see a cat running down the street and i pick it up just in time before a monster comes from across the street to eat it, and it was that persons cat from mikes mart, and if it died they would have been devestaed. then the next month i find out they won a million dollars and they are related to the president and i hate the presedent. haha ok that made no sense, but what about those people you run into several times for weird reasons and you recognize them more then you recognize the other 15000 people who live in your town. like the weird ways you run into your friends in public places, like if you didnt know them before you would see them right now, and you would hear things they would say that youo didnt hear before and those things would stay in the back oof your mind, a weird little story of that person and it will change your life some how. but you would have run into them to if they were a stranger, and the world was really trying to make sure you met this person. or when you were little and you went to the park everyday with your mom you would see this kid all the time and now you know this person again becasue they are the janitor. i guess thats not to weird at all. we all live in the same town. anyways what am i getting at?? hmm i feel like i should write down some stuff thats going through my mind right now::
denis and that jodie girl and ashley from fitzys and liv tyler, and brittany and michelle, blue flowers and water cat candy chocolate pictures, tommy lindsay, wes pictures, my dad traveling, dan, my cousins and slippers, i should call b, lauren wendys,ice storms and snow flakes, concerts. grr mother annoying anyways some people are gay including my brother